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INFECTIOUS INSANITY AMONG TODAY’S MEN AND WOMEN
WORRYFREE FARMERS ENTWINE THEMSELVES
WITH DIRT CATTLE AND COUNTRY WIVES
NEPOTISM AND INBREEDING GO HAND IN HAND
NOT JUST WITH THE ROYAL POLICE BUT ALSO
RECRUITING OFFICERS AND MARINE MINISTERS AND CORVETTE CAPTAINS
AND FIELD MARSHALS AND FIELD MISTRESSES
REQUISITIONED FROM THE RESERVES
MISERABLE SOULS DIG THEIR OWN GRAVES
ALL FOR A GUN SALUTE AND LULLABY
SLEEP AND HUNGER PREVAIL
THE MONARCH LOSES TRACK OF TIME
AND IS OVERRUN BY HIS OWN COURT
MANSIONS AND PALACES ARE PERFORATED
THE VATICAN VACILLATES
CHINESE ROYAL DAUGHTERS SMUGGLE THEIR VIRGINITY
OUT OF THEIR ROYAL LANDS
ACCOMPANIED BY SILK BUTTERFLIES
THE STRONGEST TREES BREAK FREE FROM THE UNDERGROWTH
SWELLS OF CLOUDS BILLOW SKYWARD
THE SEA SWALLOWS THE CONTINENTS
WHILE BIRDS DRAG THE HORIZON ALONG
SKIFFS ARE OVERTAKEN IN A STORM
FORCING THEM OFF THEIR SMUGGLING ROUTES
QUARTERDECKS ARE CLEARED OF SAILORS
AND LOADED WITH PIGS AND FAIR MAIDENS
THE CHILDREN OF THE NATIVES ARE CAST OUT
AND SKINNED ON THE STERN WITH THE BIRDS AND FISH
THEIR FATHERS GET THEIR HEADS CAVED IN
IF THEY ARE TOO STUPID OR TOO CLEVER
A BLOODBATH SOUNDS BEST AT SEA
HER MAJESTY COULD SHARPEN A KNIFE
AND JOIN THE BRAWL
SPEWING POISON AND HACKING AWAY
THE MOATS ARE OVERFLOWING
WITH COLD SWEAT
PESSIMISM REIGNS FROM THE STALLS
ALL THE WAY TO THE BALLS
MECHANICAL WARFARE SHOOK ENEMIES AND ALLIES ALIKE
NOW ANYONE COULD GO TO WAR ON A WILD HORSE
AND DEFEAT A WHOLE REGIMENT
ALL TO BE STABBED IN THE BACK BY A CHAPLAIN
ANYONE CAN TAKE UP THE CROSS
EVEN JESUS STUCK HIMSELF UP THERE
THEN SKIPPED AWAY
ACROSS THE ATMOSPHERE
THE TITANIC WAS PACKED WITH REFUGEES
THE ARISTOCRATS’ CHILDREN FLOATED TOPSIDE
BUT THEIR FORTUNES SANK
THE WEARIEST WIDOWS FOUND ROOM IN THE LIFEBOATS
LAND DEEDS AND TRAVELLERS’ CHEQUES STICKING OUT OF THEIR TITS
PROUD FRIGATES LAY SIDEWAYS ON THE WAVES
LEAVE ME A CESSPOOL IN DENMARK
IF THAT’S WHERE I BELONG
THE QUEEN HAS YET TO LEAVE HER OWN HEIR
SO MUCH AS A BARREL OF SAND
MERCENARIES AND DAY LABORERS CROSS THE CHANNEL
FEELINGS OF SOLIDARITY AND SUB-ZERO TEMPERATURES
MASQUERADES AND TIRADES
ALL THE TRAITORS TEARS
ON THE ROYAL STAGE
THIS TIME WE’LL SPAR WITH BEAUTY AND WIT
OR RAW POWER AND PERVERSITY
I SHALL OUTDO ALL MY KIND
AND FORCE THEM TO LIVE A HUMBLE AND RELIGIOUS LIFE
I’M CAUGHT BETWEEN TWO MEN WITH BAD BREATH
THERE IS A DEVILISH AURA AROUND ME
WHIRRING AND BAROQUE IN THE BACKGROUND
WE DRANK WINE WITH THE SAME URGENCY
THAT SOBER PEOPLE DRINK WATER
AND I FELT PURSUED BY MY OWN WAYS
IT WON’T BE THE COMMON MAN’S CENTURY ANYWAY
SO GET OUT OF THE WAY
AND DON’T RUN INTO THE FIELDS
RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF HARVEST
Jordan Barger is a translator of Norwegian and Danish, with an MFA in Literary Translation from The University of Iowa. Translations have appeared in Poetry Magazine, Poetry Review UK, FENCE and Sleepingfish XX. Their translation of Sigbjørn Obstfelder’s The Red Drops appeared onstage in Philadelphia thanks to Sewer Rats Productions.